I plan on using the word in the literal context as well as figurative. After this past year, I almost feel as though it’s a right of passage to hug, or embrace, others. To be clear, I’m not a hugger. Or toucher. Keeping it real, I’m a, “Please don’t come within 6 feet of me”, even pre-pandemic person. Sometimes, though, people just need a hug. My person is a hugger, so I’m going to hug the crap out of her! When someone I know is sad, I’m going to hug them, even if it’s awkward (so be prepared for weird hugs, people). I’m not going to be going around just randomly hugging people. People touching me still creeps me out, but I’m going to try the embracing thing for comfort. And, if it freaks me out too much, I’ll embrace that, too, and not do it!
This year, I started “reading” more. I use quotes because I’m actually listening to audiobooks. I used to think that was only for people who travelled a lot. I did it when I made my daily 45 minute commute to Cleveland for work when we first moved here. After I stopped making that drive, I stopped audiobooks. I almost felt like there was some sort of pressure to sit and physically read a book as opposed to listening to it. Like people would judge me for not holding a hold and reading it myself. Then, it got more intense. I should be reading intellectual books as opposed to the fluff that I actually enjoy. What all of this led to was me not reading. Period. So, at the beginning of this year, I decided to give audiobooks a try. I embraced the awesomeness of being able to clean my house, bake, do laundry, etc, while “reading” a book. I also stopped the nonsense of having to read a specific type of book. I’m reading what I like. I have embraced the fact that I just don’t have time to sit down with a physical book to read. I have embraced the fact that I’m not an intellectual book reader. I want my books to take me to a fantasy world instead of throwing me into the reality I’m trying to escape from.
I am trying to embrace all of the things I can not change. We are living in a world of hate right now. I can not change that. Nor do I want to embrace it, but I can embrace the fact that I’m surrounding myself with as much love as possible. I’m embracing the fact that some people just need to be cut from my life. I’m embracing the fact that I’m, hopefully, raising my kids to not be part of the hate in this world.
On the lines of things I can not change, weather is included. This summer has been heat and rain. Very little in between. I can not change it. I was getting frustrated with all of the softball we were missing, but then, decided to embrace the extra time we were given to just relax and do nothing. We have so little of that, that it’s refreshing. Do I want Sunshine to play softball? Of course, but I do not control the weather. I will embrace the extra time I am given.
Embracing life is not easy. I am frustrated and sad and mad, a lot. So, I’m starting with the little things, like my books, my hair, the weather, etc. My anxiety is going to be a tougher one to tackle. I can not change others’ actions. I wrote about actions shaping my anxiety. My anxiety is both my kryptonite and my superpower. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to do with trying to embrace it, but heck, even if I can’t, I’ll embrace the fact that I tried!